Two thoughts:

  1. I believe that when I ask for help, I am an inconvenience to others.
  2. When my children are newborns, I believe they are a problem to be solved or a task to be accomplished.

Both of these beliefs came to the surface the other night when Scott & I were out on a date night (yay!).  I want to unpack them more and connect some dots to see how they influence my actions and values.  Also I want to trace where they come from and get some understanding in regards to their roots.  It’s so freeing to finally figure out one of the reasons why I collapse in on myself when I feel overwhelmed instead of going to others.

And these faces?

 

ImageImage

 

Although I love them dearly and would sacrifice so much for them, it is a challenge for me to emotionally bond with my little bitties when they are first here.  Which is gut wrenching to admit but I hope very freeing as well.

With Baby #3 very much becoming a reality in the next few weeks, these two realizations hold so much weight.  I want to enjoy our babies.  I want to be okay asking for help.

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